Tag Archives: twitter
Porn on Twitter - The Anti-Social Media

Porn on Twitter

Porn on Twitter - The Anti-Social Media

Twitter made a big stink last year by creating their own photo service.

Here’s something you probably didn’t notice though (unless you’re a dirty pervert), Twitter allows people to post porn.

Finally, you can share all your nasty, 140 character fantasies with all of your followers. Want to show your crappy cell phone pic of wang all over town? Twitter’s got you covered. Want the world to see your ta-tas? Tweet them out.

This is different from other image services, which had policies in place so we didn’t have to see your nasty junk.  They would take down your photos because they knew no one wanted to see that. Twitter, on the other hand, only has policies about child pornography.

Everything else is a fair, naked game.

Twitter can’t monitor every body part that gets posted on there. Porn stars have been tweeting their private parts for years now. And now the unwashed masses can join them in the orgy of fleshy images.

No longer do we need to worry if we can share our junk next to our resume and a link to a cute cat. We can. But the burden is entirely on us to behave like rational human beings. Isn’t that terrifying?

Just because you can keep your porn on Twitter, you probably shouldn’t. People look at that stuff, and we don’t need to know how kinky you really are. Really, we don’t.

Don’t the trending topics provide enough horror?

Comments { 2 }
Twitter Trends - The Anti-Social Media

Trending Topics on Twitter

Twitter Trends - The Anti-Social MediaI recently started paying more attention to the trending topics section on Twitter. Somehow, I forgot how awful the trending topics are.

Trending topics have all the benefits of giving yourself a lobotomy. However, they come without the high price or inherent danger of performing a clumsy self-surgery on your brain. They somehow manage to combine the absolute worst in ideas, writing, and respect for other human beings in less than 140 characters.

It takes serious effort to be that consistently bad.

Let’s take a trend from last week and use it as an example: #iusetothink

This trend would be fine if people used it correctly. We would see a bunch of people saying “A good workout #iusetothink” or “A walk with the dog #iusetothink.” But no, that would be too obvious and would assume that people understood basic tense agreement.

Instead, we have a bunch of people saying things that they USED to think. This trend has caught on so much that even brands, whose community managers should know better, used the hashtag in a desperate attempt to stay out of touch and in front of an audience. It makes brands look dumb.

Marketers - based on this example, we can assume that the audience for promoted trends doesn’t even understand the basics of grammar. Do you honestly believe that the people who share trending topics will grasp your weird promoted trend and be able to help you accomplish your business goals?

This is why Twitter’s trending topics fail so miserably. Putting some funky hashtagged term in the face of hundreds of millions of Twitter users does not mean an instant success. You can’t target if you’re getting the brightest people, or those who need to go back to grammar school. And both of those groups will find a way to twist your message around in ways you never expected.

So avoid giving yourself the stress and brain damage and just avoid trending topics. Your brain cells will thank me later.

Comments { 3 }

8 Predictions About Social Media in 2012

2012 Social Media Predictions - The Anti-Social MediaHappy 2012! It’s a new year for marketers to mine more data from our user profiles on social networks. More hyper-targeted ads! How exciting!

Because the internet is fueled on rumors and nonsense, here’s what will happen in 2012. If it doesn’t happen, well it will all be ok. I think.

  • Facebook will change once more, and everyone will hate it. - We all know it will change, and it will suck balls.
  • Twitter will get even worse - Monetizing Twitter will take over idea to allow users to share meaningful messages. Twitter will become filled with crappy more 140 character ads, spambots, and insightful hashtags like #mydickinthreewords. Twitter will only hang on because the mass media will give it more hype than it deserves.
  • Nobody except job seekers and self-absorbed, so-called assholes experts will care about LinkedIn. Oh, and Betty from HR will like it as well. But it’s her job to care about LinkedIn.
  • Google+ will either make it or fail miserably - Time to put up or shut up Google.
  • Quora will go away -  Seriously, it’s still here?
  • There will be at least 20 new social networks that claim to be “Facebook Killers” - No one sane will use them besides Linux users and Android elitists.
  • The entire internet will be absorbed in baseless iPhone rumors - Because our entire existence and worth as a human is based solely on successfully predicting a mobile phone we’ll use for a year until the next one comes out.
  • There will be at least one viral cat video - Wait. There will be hundreds. And they will be the best ones ever.

Honestly, most of that is just expansions of what happened in 2011, but who am I kidding? It’s not like someone will be clever enough to make a successfully monetized social network without a newsfeed and a slew of advertising. That’s just too creative.

So here’s to 2012.  May my Facebook newsfeed be ever filled with sponsored stories!

Comments { 23 }
New New Twitter Promo

New New Twitter


New new Twitter - The Anti-Social Media

Could Twitter have done a worse job of corrupting the fundamentals of their service in the name of selling more crappy 140 character ads?

Comments { 19 }

Tweeting Won’t Get You a Job

Twitter Jobs - The Anti-Social Media

There’s a myth that all it takes to get a social media job is an overinflated Klout score and the ability to use “the Twitter.”


The ancient order of rockstar social media ninja gurus will probably never let us live that down. Jerks.

Maybe that worked in 2008 when people we’re easily distracted by all the shiny widgets, but these days a robust social media presence doesn’t demonstrate much if you’re not able to tie that social media presence into a business goal. The CEOs and business leaders I know look at social media as a strategic tool to effectively communicate and advance their business goals.

In other words, they look at social media and they suck the fun out of it.

They don’t care that it’s fun. They don’t  care about #tigerblood. They care about making more money and growing their business. It’s that simple.

Sure, you can use Twitter to build your thought leadership, but rarely do you get by on thought leadership alone. At the end of the day, you need to have the connections, talent, and skills to make a noticeable positive difference in the business.

So stop tweeting for the fun of it. Make connections with the people who can get your lazy tweeting butt a job.  Work with a local volunteer organization or non-profit to enhance their goals through social media.

And for the love of all that’s holy: nobody cares about your lame Klout score. Get over your dumb, meaningless number.

Comments { 9 }
Broken Heart - The Anti-Social Media


Broken Heart - The Anti-Social MediaWhen was the last time you unfollowed or unfriended someone?

If you’re like most people, it’s been a while since you’ve sat down and evaluated what your online relationships are doing for you.

It’s easy to just keep following people and adding friends. If it were up to the social networks, that’s all you’d do. You’d end up drowning in so much information you’d never be able to take your eyes off the news feed.

But that’s not how people live their lives.

We make choices about which relationships we build and which ones we neglect. We choose to communicate with some people on certain channels and keep the everyone else for if and when we need them. We decide to sit on Facebook and Twitter all night rather than getting coffee or dinner with someone we haven’t seen in a while.

The joy of modern life is that even when we are alone, we continue to be together, building the weakest of relationships.

But if those relationships aren’t doing anything for you, drop them. Do you know why you follow that person on Twitter? Can you remember  where you actually met all 647 of your Facebook friends, and what they do for you? If you can’t give one valid reason, and you have no idea where a person is from, it’s time to unfriend them.

I know. It sucks. But sometimes, that’s what we have to do. Relationships change. People move on.

Some relationships end with a bang. Others end with a whimper. And in the age of social networks, we end ours when we click “Unfriend.”

Unfollow someone who isn’t entertaining or informing you anymore. Your time and relationships are precious. Don’t waste them.

Comments { 33 }
Don't Link Things to LinkedIn - The Anti-Social Media

Why You Should Never Connect Your LinkedIn and Twitter Accounts

Don't Link Things to LinkedIn - The Anti-Social MediaThere is no way I can sugarcoat this:

Do not link your Twitter account to your LinkedIn account.

Tweets attached to your LinkedIn Profile drive me insane. Your LinkedIn profile is like your resume. How much crap do you want to put on there?

Look, I know you’re a smart, sarcastic person. Why else would you be reading this blog? But there’s something terribly wrong when I start seeing those hilarious tweets next to your resume.

Would you talk that way to your boss? To your clients? Because that’s what you’re doing when you allow those tweets to get pulled into your LinkedIn profile.

When you automate your tweets to LinkedIn, it shows everyone that you don’t care about the medium and audience. You’re more concerned with blasting your messages out than who might actually be reading them.

It sucks to take an extra thirty seconds to share something on LinkedIn. I know. I do it every day even though I think no one ever reads them. But I know that I’ve segmented that status to appeal to my professional and business network rather than just being a sarcastic asshole.

So, if you’re going to update LinkedIn, take the time to compose a specific message just for that audience. That’s all I ask.

Also, I’m still seeing links to your crappy porn on your LinkedIn profile thanks to your automated tweets. Be grateful no one actually reads LinkedIn updates except for me. Otherwise, we’d all be talking about your depraved tastes.

So go unlink your Twitter and LinkedIn profiles. Then come here and tell me the worst thing you saw on LinkedIn thanks to Twitter. I want to know how many other people have to deal with porn on LinkedIn.

Comments { 42 }
Follow Everyone - The Social Media

F*#k You Friday! Follow Friday

Follow Everyone - The Social MediaDoes anyone still care about Follow Friday?

When I joined Twitter is 2007, it was cool to be mentioned and featured. Now it’s crap lost in the stream.

So, if you’re going to do a Follow Friday, don’t post a list of seemingly random user names. No one cares about that now and no one cared about it before. Instead, give people a legitimate reason to follow that person. For example:

Follow @JayDolan because he is the best writer and cartoonist on the internet and always makes me laugh. #FF

That’s much more useful information to someone than:

Follow Friday! #FF @JayDolan @TheAntiMedia @TheOatmeal @alliebrosh LOLz

See the difference? Good. Let’s make Follow Friday somewhat useful for those 15 people who still care.

Do you still care about follow Friday? Does anyone? And why haven’t you given me a Follow Friday shout out?

Comments { 3 }